Life Riddled with Doubts.
As salamu alaykum.
I heard that in Islam we’re instructed to leave doubts and focus on what we’re certain of. I’ve learnt a lot of Islamic advice which has been helpful to me.
However, what do I do in the case of where I’m not certain of anything? Like for example, I know that if you’re not sure if an impurity has touched you, you assume it hasn’t until you’re certain. But, the only way to be certain is if you check. Inevitably leading you to that process.
I get doubts upon doubts. In my everyday life. I don’t think I can differentiate between a baseless doubt and a valid query anymore. I have to keep checking for answers and wondering.
Furthermore, on a daily I feel like I make some mistakes within Salah, as I have issues with pronunciation (I’m currently trying to improve tajweed) and nervousness. I decide that I would think about them after my salah to conclude if they were truly mistakes that would invalidate my prayer or not. However, after prayer sometimes I kind of forget about them. So I’m left confused. I decided that since I can’t remember what I did, I should move on. In some cases afterwards I can remember the things I did in salah (vaguely or completely) and sometimes I can conclude that I’m fine, but other times I’m not sure if they were actually things that could invalidate my salah or mistakes that could be dismissed, or not even a mistake at all – my thoughts get clouded. I wish to move on from these thoughts completely because I’m afraid if I attempt to remember what I had forgotten, then my mind would end up distorting it/making it seem worse than it is, and bring me more doubts. I also worry about forgetfulness in Salah, so I end up worrying that I have to do Sajdah Sahw.
My problems in salah are usually:
1. Pronunciation errors that I fear I did deliberately and could have avoided.
2. Voice getting breathless/shaky either due to me trying to read an invocation smoothly in one go, or due to anxiety.
Doubts have consumed general aspects of my daily life too.
1. The fear of the release of madhy. Constantly I fear that whatever and whoever I look at, regardless of whatever or not it/they are pleasing to look at, or even what words I hear and see, will cause a release. Sometimes I get a feeling below, even when I believe I’m not aroused, so I get confused and start second-guessing myself. But I wonder if that feeling is actually the result of fear/anxiety of getting aroused, and not actual arousal. Normal discharge can come out at any time for women, and if it comes out near or the same time as that ‘arousal’, it confuses me.
2. Touching impurities. (Which I’ve seen good advice for).
The advice I have found so far has been helpful, however, I feel like I get doubts way too often. So I was hoping to get an ultimatum. I want my doubts to finish completely in every aspect of my life.
In every situation in which I get a doubt, can I just move on?
May Allah ﷻ bless you. Ameen.
Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,
Yes, ignore the doubts and just move on. You are correct in understanding that unless you are certain, you do not pay any attention to the doubts.
Do not pay worry about the pronounciation errors. Just try your best to recite correctly, and move on with the first recitation. In your case, after trying your best, even if you assume that you pronounced incorrectly, it will be fine.
As for forgetting, if you recited 3 verses and then forget, then immediately just go into Ruku’ amd complete the Rak’ah.
With regards to the release of Madhi, we suggest that you insert a tampon, pad, or cotton in the opening of the vagina to prevent the discharge from coming to the outer area. In this way, your Wudhu will not break.
Alternatively, take the shortest Salah time in your area, and see if you discharge so much that you cannot get enough time to perform Wudhu and Salah. In that case, you will become a Ma’dhurah, and you would not have to worry of your Wudhu breaking.
You should also recite the following as much as possible:
أعوذُ باِللهِ مِنَ الشَّيطَانِ الرَّجِيم
“I seek refuge in Allah from the rejected devil.”
لاحول ولا قوة إلا بالله
“There is no power and no strength except with Allah”
اَللَّهُمَّ اجْعَلْ وَسَاوِسَ قَلْبِىْ خَشْيَتَكَ وَ ذِكْرَكَ وَ اجْعَلْ هِمَّتِىْ وَ هَوَايَ فِيْمَا تُحِبُّ وَ تَرْضَى
“O Allah! Convert the whisperings of my heart into Your fear and rememberance and divert my will and courage to the performance of deeds that please You.”
قلت: أرأيت رجلا توضأ ثم شك في بعض وضوئه وذلك أول ما شك؟ قال: عليه أن يغسل ذلك الموضع الذي شك فيه. قلت: فإن كان يلقى ذلك كثيرا يعرض له الشيطان بذلك في صلاته أو بعد فراغه منها حتى يكثر ذلك عليه؟ قال: لا يلتفت إلى شيء من هذا، ويمضي في صلاته، ولا يعيد شيئا من ذلك (الأصل للشيباني – 1/ 53)
الْيَقِينُ لَا يَزُولُ بِالشَّكِّ (الأشباه والنظائر لابن نجيم (ص: 56)
اور اگر وضوء کر چکنے کے پعد شک ہو تو کچھ پرواہ نہ کرے (بہشتی زيور – 1/47)
وإذا احتشت المرأة فإن كان الاحتشاء في الفرج الخارج والفرج الخارج بمنزلة الألسن والقلفة، فإذا ابتل داخل الحشو ونفذ إلى خارجه أو لم ينفذ انتقض وضوءها، وإن كان الاحتشاء في الفرج الداخل فابتل داخل الحشو إن لم ينفذ إلى خارجه لا ينتقض وضوءها (المحيط البرهاني – 1/ 58)
فلو أحست به فوضعت الكرسف في الفرج الداخل ومنعته من الخروج فهي طاهرة كما لو حبس المني في القصبة (رد المحتار – 1/ 308)