Monthly Archives: May 2018

Contact with someone I intend marrying

Contact with someone I intend marrying

31 May 2018 Ref-No#: 713

salaam,

I am a girl of 19 years and currently in a relationship with a boy. This Ramadan I realized that coming near to zina is not allowed so it means that I am not allowed to talk to this boy. My mother and his mother are informed about us. We told them and they told us that it was fine as long as we don’t do things we will regret. The thing is that I love this boy VERY much and we are both planing to marry inshallah but because we are not financially stable (we study at university) we can not get married. My parents and his parents want us to get a degree first. But for me waiting 5 more years are at least 3 is to long. The reason that I am in a hurry to marry him is cause I can not talk to him til I get married. I did some researcher and it was saying that it is permissible to talk to a boy if a family member is involved but I feel very awkward about this. Not that we are saying inappropriate things but i just don’t feel at eas.

My question is can I talk to him alone in a public place? If the answer is no what can I do to still remain contact with him without involving another person. I was planning to see him only for a few hours ones in a month in a public place but I have no idea if that is clever. I fear that the one day a month becomes 3,4,5… days.At least I am used to talking to him everyday on Facebook on Ramadan and during the exams we don’t talk but i always feel the urge to talk to him what can I do?
I thank you in advance for you’re answer

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa batakatuhu,

It is not permissible to maintain any unnecessary contact with a non Mahram (a person with who nikaah is permissible) of the opposite gender. There is a great possibility that the casual relationship will eventually lead to haram. It is precisely for this reason that our religion has prohibited free mixing with the opposite gender and made lowering of the gaze compulsory. It is not permissible to even speak to a person of the opposite gender, if there is no valid reason, even though a family member may be there.

Allah says in the Qur’an,

ولا تقربوا الزنا إنه كان فاحشة وساء سبيلا

“Nor come nigh to adultery: for it is a shameful (deed) and an evil, opening the road (to other evils)” (Surah al-Israa V 32).

قل للمؤمنين يغضوا من أبصارهم ويحفظوا فروجهم ذلك أزكى لهم إن الله خبير بما يصنعون

“Say to the believers they should lower their gaze and guard their private parts, that is purer for them. Allah is Aware of the things they do” (Surah al-Noor V 30).

وَقُل لِّلْمُؤْمِنَاتِ يَغْضُضْنَ مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِنَّ وَيَحْفَظْنَ فُرُوجَهُنَّ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا وَلْيَضْرِبْنَ بِخُمُرِهِنَّ عَلَى جُيُوبِهِنَّ …الخ

“And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms…” (Surah al-Noor V 31)

In short, Shariah has closed all the doors that may lead one to commit illicit sins. Although you both intend to get married, it is still not permissible to maintain any contact.

In your case, your desire to be in contact with the boy in reference is the consequences of your previous contact. If you did not have the previous contact, you would not have had this desire in you now. The previous contact has created an urge and uneasiness in you to be in contact with the boy now. If this feeling is the consequence of your previous contact, imagine the consequences of being in contact again or having continuous connection with him. As you have stated yourself, from one meeting, it will increase. Then from meeting in public places, it will extend to meeting in private. Etc.

Ponder over this carefully. How can you be sure that you will not do ‘things that you will regret’? What happens if you invest so much time and effort in maintaining this relationship, but when he completes his degree, he changes his mind? How can you be so sure that the same desire will be there in three to five years time?

Defend your Imaan and chastity from the onslaught and whispers of shaitan. Turn to Allah and make Tauba for giving in to the thoughts of infatuations. Cry and beg to Allah to take away such thoughts from you. Avoid all contact with the boy. There will be withdrawals in you. This is similar to the withdrawal of stopping from drugs. All you need is courage. Your mind and heart will get used to the absence of the boy in a few days time and you will be normalized.

As a last resort, if you really want to mantain contact, then atleast perform the Nikah now, and each of you can waive off your respective rights as a spouse. You can inform him that he does not have to financially support you. Thus, your lives may continue as they are currently, but you may talk and even meet each other. Your meeting will then be based on a firm foundation and commitment (Nikah).

Pimples on Scalp

Pimples on Scalp

30 May 2018 Ref-No#: 708

Assalamu Alaikum,

I sent in a question previously about my struggles with acne on my scalp. In your answer to my previous question, you mentioned that if the pimple on my head was leaking fluid (blood/pus) and I had to make ghusl, I could make ghusl provided I was ‘excused’ and the impurity from said popped pimple would also be excused. I would like some clarification on this – if there is a leaking popped pimple on my head, but one full prayer time has not yet passed (therefore I am not yet excused) and I need to make ghusl, what do I do? Also, does this being ‘excused’ also apply to showering normally because I really need to keep my scalp clean to help heal my scalp but it’s so hard to find a time when there are no leaking pimples on my scalp?

Jazakallah

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

To clarify, its only ONE prayer time that you need the pimples to bleed continuously in such a way that you do not get sufficient time to make Wudhu and pray Salah without the pimples bleeding. After that one time, the pimples should bleed atleast once in every subsequent prayer time for you to continue being a Ma’dhurah (excused).

If you do not become a Ma’dhurah in the manner mentioned in the previous answer and above, and there is a pimple bleeding, you should wait for the blood to stop, and then make Ghusl. If that is difficult due to the continuity (as you have stated), then you may make Ghusl with the pimple bleeding, and merely perform Wudhu once the bleeding stops. The bleeding of the pimple nullifies Wudhu, and not Ghusl. Thus, if you make Ghusl with the bleeding pimple, the Ghusl will be done, but you will need to make Wudhu.

And if you are a Ma’dhurah, you can perform Ghusl with the bleeding, and both Ghusl and Wudhu will be done.

 

 

 

Hiding sins and marriage

Hiding sins and marriage

29 May 2018 Ref-No#: 706

Assalam o alykum,
I’m single mom of 11 yrs old daughter living with my parents. After my separation with my husband I lost into wrong path and got into bad company and habits for sometime. I did sins which I’m ashamed of.

Few months ago, I met a guy and we got physical too. We got committed to eachother and planned to marry after his hajj this year. When I met him, I was in my worse time of life morally and Islamically. He changed me to become a better person as any Muslim should be. We stopped getting physical until we get marry. There were few past incidents I was ashamed of and hid one of it from him, because according to islam when a Muslim repent to Allah, he should not disclose his sin. This was my understanding. Recently, someone tried to poison our relation and told him my sin to him. My fiance brokeup with me. I am now very broken and disheartened. I don’t know what was my mistake since I already changed myself to become a better person. He’s very firm in his decision and don’t want to marry me anymore. I am very close to him and can’t imagine myself to go away from him. I begged him to forgive me. I gave him reason why did I hid something shameful. I even told him that it’s in islam to not disclose sins openly especially when one has left everything.

Please guide us in this regard. I feel I will go astray again. He was the one who made me better person. I wanted to marry him. I am not a woman who go after money and status. I wanted someone who fear Allah and we planned to lead a clean life.

I want to marry him although he didn’t trust my reason for hiding sins. Please guide us, what islam says in such cases? A man should marry and forgive what happened in past since they both repent already?

Jazakallah

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

No person is perfect. In a narration of Sunan at-Tirmidhi it is related that the Prophet (Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said,

“كل بنى آدم خطاء ، وخير الخطائين التوابون”
(رواه الترمذي)

“Every human is a sinner, and the best of sinners are thise who repent.” (Tirmidhi)

We pray that Allah Ta’ala has accepted your repentance.

Sister, whilst I sympathize with you and make Dua for you, I wish to offer you my honest and sincere advice. Please do read my advice carefully and ponder over it. Do not be emotional.

You may be aware that Islam prohibits a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. There are many negative factors in it; some of which you are presently experiencing. Had you followed the path of Deen and abstained from such a relationship, you would not have hurt yourself. You are now suffering the consequences of the un-Islamic relationship. Since you are a single mom, please guard yourself against the hungry men waiting to fulfill their sexual appetites through promises and enticements.

It is the system of Allah that when a person sins, he enjoys for a little while, but then regrets later. Someone aptly likened it to a credit card; where you enjoy now but have to pay later.

It is the whispers (Wasaawis) of the devil that you can only practise Deen if you return back to that man. Your entire relationship with him was incorrect. One can never get closer to Allah whilst engaged in Haram.

As for your question, even though you made Tawba, that does not make it incumbent on your ex-finace to marry you. He still has an independent choice.

You are correct in stating that we should not reveal our sins. But now he has learnt about the past, and he is at liberty to choose how to proceed from here.

Moving forward, you need to cut off all ties with this man, and any other non Mahram male. There is no barakah in any discussion you try to have with him directly. If anyone is really interested in your, they should approach th

Alhamdulillah, you are making Tawbah and Istigfar. This clearly means that you are making a promise to Allah Ta’ala that you will give up the sin you perpetrated and that you will never commit them again.

Secondly, control your emotions. Think about it: you might force him to marry you. Even if he agrees, he will always have flashbacks of your previous errors (even though Allah has forgiven them). How will he then remain commited to the relationship?

Continuously make Dua and implore Allah to bless you with a spouse who is good for your Deen and Dunya. You might think that it is only this person who can cause you to remain firm on Deen. Obviously, that is not the case. Through the Barakah of Dua and Sabr (patience), Allah will bless you with who is best for you.

Sister, Allah Ta’ala has granted you a very high status as a Muslim woman. You are a jewel who needs to be treasured, loved and admired by only that man who will be given to you in nikah. Allah Ta’ala is most Merciful and most Forgiving.  He will not punish you nor abandon you if you turn sincerely to Him and give up that which is not acceptable for you as a Muslimah.

Cover yourself as Allah Ta’ala has commanded you to.  Spend more time reading the Quran with understanding, make zikr constantly and perform tahajjud salaah every night. Involve yourself in activities, deeds and practices that will earn you Allah Ta’ala’s pleasure instead of his wrath and anger.

Give up those deeds and actions which will reduce you to being a helpless slave of shaitaan Always remember that you are the Creation of Allah Ta’ala and only the man He has destined for you as a husband will be the right one for you. Although you may feel unhappy now since the man’s family rejects you, remember that it may be what Allah Ta’ala wants for you.

May Allah Ta’ala guide you to treasure yourself and honour yourself as you should truly be honoured and treasured. May you also be granted what is good for your imaan and your aagirah and may you be protected from what is harmful for you and your imaan. Ameen.

Impurites

Impurites

25 May 2018 Ref-No#: 684

Assalamu Alaikum

The more I have been researching about cleaning impurities in the Hanafi madhab the more confused I have become. In some cases, they say washing once is enough but then someone says you have to wash three times, then I read that it depends on whether you’re using running water or not and I can’t figure out if one has to wash a cup once and then wait for it to stop dripping (also do you wait for it to stop dripping for a few minutes or does it have to be nearly dry) or does it depend on the material of the cup and so on and so forth. All of this has become very confusing for me. I know asking such a general question might be a bit too much but I really need some clarity on the topic. Could you please clarify this issue of cleaning impurity for me, like when is it alright to wash impurity once or three times, or when is simply removing with tissue enough, as well as what “wash” means (like how would one “wash” a wall when the water will run down to the floor or “wash” a floor), etc?

Also, If you could also point me to a Hanafi fiqh book (in English) that discusses issues like this, I would be very grateful.

Jazakallah

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

Impurities are classified differently according to Shariah Islamic Law. Hence the method required to cleanse an object of an impurity would be dependant on which category the impurity falls under.

It would also depend on the nature of the object that is impure. For example, the required method of removing the impurity from leather would differ from another type of fabric; just as it would differ if the impurity is on the body or on a utensil.

The details of these can be found in the books of fiqh.

We suggest that you refer to the English Bahishti Zewar.

Otoplasty

Otoplasty

24 May 2018 Ref-No#: 693

Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

I have a question regarding otoplasty, which is surgery that pins protruding ears back.

I have had protruduing ears my whole life and they have caused me psychological distress. I have been mocked for them and have personally always disliked them.

Neither of my parents have protruding ears or any one in my family that I know of (grandparents, uncles, aunties) and I do not believe it was genetic. I believe my ears stem from the positions I was put to rest and sleep in when I was a newborn.

In my country, we have a sleeping cot in which when one is put to rest or sleep, the ears can be pushed out into a protruding position due to the shape of the cot and how the baby is positioned.

I have come to learn that within the first 6 months of a baby being born, cartilage in the ear is still being developed and if ears are in a certain position for a prolonged period of time, they can take this shape permanantly. After 6 months, the cartilage becomes hard and the shape of the ears can no longer be altered naturally. I believe that during the time I was put to rest, the prolonged period of my ears being in a protruding position has caused them to take this position permanantly.

Would it be permissible to perform otoplasty to get my ears pinned back? The surgery is very minor, and can even be done in a surgeons office instead of a hospital, and it doesn’t have a risk to ones life. The ears would only be pinned back to a point where they look normal.

JazakAllah Khair

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

It is permissible for a person to undergo surgery to rectify any disorder on his body or defect on his body, as long as the surgery does not pose any risk to ones life.

A protruding ear is a defect; and hence, rectifying it with surgery will not fall under cosmetic surgery.

Thus, it is permissible for you to perform otoplasty to get your ears pinned back.

References

في الخانية: رجل له سلعة أو حجر فأراد أن يستخرجه ويخاف منه الموت قال أبو يوسف رحمه الله: إن كان فعله أحد فنجا فلا بأس بأن يفعل لأنه يكون معالجة ولا يكون تعريضا للهلاك. وفي الفتاوى: إذا أراد الرجل أن يقطع إصبعا زائدة أو شيئا آخر قال أبو نصر رحمه الله تعالى: إن كان الغالب على من قطع مثل ذلك الهلاك فإنه لا يفعل لأنه تعريض النفس للهلاك وإن كان الغالب هو النجاة فهو في سعة من ذلك ( فتاوى قاضيخان: 3/313 )

  إذا أراد الرجل أن يقطع إصبعا زائدة أو شيئا آخر قال نصير رحمه الله تعالى إن كان الغالب على من قطع مثل ذلك الهلاك فإنه لا يفعل وإن كان الغالب هو النجاة فهو في سعة من ذلك …من له سلعة زائدة يريد قطعها إن كان الغالب الهلاك فلا يفعل وإلا فلا بأس به كذا في خزانة المفتين ( الفتاوى الهندية: 5/440)

Three divorces

Three divorces

23 May 2018 Ref-No#: 674

Assalam.o.Alikum muje ye malum karna hy or mje fatwa b chye is per k kia aik waqt ma 3 talaq ho sakty hy mje refrance k sat ans dijye ga JazakAllah

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wabarakatuhu,

Yes, three divorces issued in one sitting are valid and binding.

Please refer to the following link for detailed referances:

Three Talaaqs – Divorces ( Detailed )

Merits of Ayatul Kursi

Merits of Ayatul Kursi

23 May 2018 Ref-No#: 694

Assalumu 3alaykoum.

I want to know the veracity of these two sayings about Ayatul Kursi

1) Whoever recites ayatul kursi when he leaves his home, he will have 70 000 angels protecting him to the left, right in front and behind us. And if we die before returning home, a reward equal to 40 martyrs will be awarded to us.

2) When reciting ayatul kursi 40 times daily at sundown, a reward of 40 Hajj will be awarded.

Allah y jazikoum bi kheir

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

We were unable to find these two narrations in any of books of Ahadith at our disposal.

The only book in which they are narrated is Nuzha al-Majalis. However, no referance of chain of transmission is mentioned.

Thus, it will not be permissible to quote these narrations.

That, however, does not invalidate any of the other various narrations mentioned in authentic books of Ahadith.

References

وفي حديث آخر: من قرأها عند غروب الشمس أربعين مرة كتب الله له أربعين حجة ……

……وقال جابر بن عبدالله سمعت رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم يقول ” من قرأ آية الكرسي حين يخرج من بيته وكل الله به سبعين ألف ملك يحفظونه من بين يديه ومن خلفه وعن يمينه وعن شماله وإن مات قبل أن يرجع أعطاه الله ثواب أربعين شهيدا ”
(نزهة المجالس و منتخب النفايس ، 39 & 41)

Upper body exposed in Ihraam

Upper body exposed in Ihraam

23 May 2018 Ref-No#: 691

Asalam alikom.
I have doing Umrah and I completed the tawaf and after I prayed 2 rakats in Ibrahim station, but I saw Black stone was not busy, so I tried to kiss it, and it got busy there suddenly. I kissed it but my upper ihram disappeared from nearby the black stone and then I got upper ihram from shop out in Mecca and I completed umrah in that. So is there any damm or what should i do now? Is my umrah completed by rules of islam?
Jazak Ullah

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

Since it was your upper body that was exposed, and your ‘Awrah (area between navel and knees) was still concealed, your ‘Umrah is valid and there is no penalty upon you.

Early Menstruation after miscarriage

Early Menstruation after miscarriage

20 May 2018 Ref-No#: 683

Assala mualaikum

I had a miscarriage at 7 weeks, then I got D&C on 24th April 2018 and I was bleeding for 10/11 days, and bleeding stop maybe 3rd or 4th May 2018, I can’t remember the exact day. Most of the time my period length is 8days and sometimes 10days(its very rare). Normally I have 21 days of purity between my two periods but sometimes I have 15 or 17/18 days of purity between my two periods. This month, the bleeding started on 16May 2018 after 12/13 days from last purity and my blood flow continued to be high and I feel a lot of pain in my abdomen like my previous period.
In our country Ramadan started on 18May and my bleeding is going on.
Should I keep fasting and perform salah?? Today is 19th May and I’m fasting.

Answer

Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

Since the miscarriage was after 7 weeks, the 10 days of bleeding after the DNC will be Haidh.

Your Haidh stopped when you either did not see any blood, or you saw clear white discharge. If you cannot remember exactly if that was on the 3rd or 4th of May, you should ponder and decide on what your mind inclines to (Ghalaba adh-Dhan).

The bleeding from the 16th of May to the 18th of May will definitely be Istihaadhah, since it is before the termination of the minimum period of purity (15 days). As for the 19th of May, it could be the 15th or 16 day of your purity. In order to calculate the days of purity (inspite of the bleeding) you need to revert to your habit and cannot just take the minimum of 15 days. You would need to recall your Tuhr (purity) period from the last three cycles before you fell pregnant, and use that as your habit for your Tuhr. If it was 17 days then you will consider 17 days from the 3rd or 4th of May (depending on what you recall) as your period of purity. You should then count the bleeding as Haidh from the 18th day, and not fast or perform Salah from then.  

Yes, if the blood stops before the end of 72 hours after this, and thereafter you do not see blood for a full 10 days, then you will have to keep Qadha.

Hadith about Moosa (a.s) on fasting

Hadith about Moosa (a.s) on fasting

20 May 2018 Ref-No#: 685

Assalamu alaykum,

The following narration is doing its rounds on social media. Please verify if it is authentic:

Once Moosa (AS) asked Allah Ta’ala: O Allah! You have granted me the honor and privilege of talking to you directly, Have you given this privilege to any other person? Allah Ta’ala replied, O!! Moosa during the last period I am going to send an ummat, who will be the Ummat of Mohammed (SAW) with dry lips, parched tongues, emaciated body with eyes sunken deep into their sockets, with livers dry and stomachs suffering the pangs of hunger- will call out to me (in dua) they will be much closer to me than you O Moosa! while you speak to me there are 70000 veils between you and me but at the time of iftaar there will not be a single veil between me and the fasting Ummati of Mohammed (SAW) O!! Moosa I have taken upon myself the responsibility that at the time of iftaar I will never refuse the dua of a fasting person!

Sub’hanallah!!
Humble Request: Please spread this Hadith as much as possible to your dear ones.

Answer

Wassalam,

This narration does not come in any of the books of Ahadith.

Rather, it is narrated in Nuzhah al-Majalis (pg 182). It also appears in the Tafseer Rooh al-Bayan (8/112).

In both these books there is no Sanad (chain of transmission).

Furthermore, it is the ‘Aqeeda of Ahl as-Sunnah that the Prophets are the closest to Allah. No Ummati can be equal to a Prophet. And Moosa (alayhi as Salam) is from Ulul ‘Azm (5 greatest prophets). So there is Nakara (discrepancy) in the Matan (text) which clearly shows it is a fabrication. Thus, such messages should not be spread.