Ya shaykh my husband is strongly against me wearing niqab. And it’s causing a lot of friction in our marriage if we r disputing over it. So I stopped wearing it for a while then I tried to wear it again just even only the half niqab light color so as to get him to accept it by easing into it but he still disputed with me to not wear it and it’s causing problem in our marriage where it causes him to lash out on me and to keep peace with him I just stopped wearing it and I’m pregnant and I can’t handle the stress of dealing with his disputing to me about it.. He even scared me by bringing up violent hijab harassment incidences in the news and said if I wear it I’m surely going to get harassed too and cause him to get into fight with someone. What he said scared me so i just put niqab on the back burner. Also if I was wearing the black narrow slit niqab he won’t even allow me into the store with him and make me stay in the car while he shops :(….
Also another problem I face wearing it is I have young children 2 & 4. And I live in apartment so no private back yard and obviously I need to get my children out to the play ground to play to exercise and get fresh air. So only option I have is to take them outside in public area playground where there are other young children. When I wear niqab there the other young kids are staring and running to their parents pointing even a young girl started crying bc she was scared of me wearing niqab . I wish just females were there but men are also at the playground with their children. This is the most difficult place for me to wear the niqab. If only I had my own private backyard where I could have my own private play ground equipment but i don’t.
I was also shown a fatwa from islamqa that shaykh nuh Keller who translated reliance of the traveler said that it’s better for women in the west not to wear niqab due to putting them selves at risk for harassment and that it is a barrier to dawa. And if one does wear it they should just wear pastel colors.
Also here’s another huge issue… Prior to marriage and converting to Islam I was always was very active running outside and playing sports. My dad always took me to go running with him and was a coach. So I always was used going for runs outside with my dad getting good work outs , playing sports ect. Now that I’m married and live in apartment and wear hijab I desperately miss being able to run. My dad bought me the best jogging stroller and I have gone running sometimes on a trail where there’s not much ppl around. Wearing something long with a Nike sport hijab. Bcuz Doing home work outs with neighbors underneath flat out doesn’t cut it. I need to run for my mental and physical well being. I wish I could join a women’s only gym but unfortunately thats not possible 🙁 as there is not one around for me to join. 🙁 and like I said working out at home in apartment with neighbors underneath doesn’t cut it as I am very limited on what I can do. So considering that can I go running on the trail when it seems not much ppl around with exercise pants something long knee length and Nike hijab? My dad bought me the best jogging stroller and I just desperately want to take my children out to the trail to run with it and need to for the sake of my mental and physical health as I was acclimated to this before marriage and the lack of it is taking a toll on me exp mentally. I need this level of physical exercise to feel good and function at high leval and of course I need to be able to being a mother of young children.
Please Advise on all of the above. Jazakum Allahu Khairan.
Wa’alaykum as Salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,
Sister, it is compulsory for a female to cover herself fully. Please refer to the following three links for the relevant proofs:
Even if a Muslimah is living in a non Muslim environment, then too, it is compulsory for her to conceal herself:
Coming to your husband, it is your duty to try your best to insist that you prefer to cover yourself. Thereafter, if your husband still makes it an issue, he will be the one who is responsible for the sin. If he does not permit you, you should only leave the house when absolutely necessary, as Allah mentions in verse 33 of Surah al-Ahzaab:
وَقَرْنَ فِي بُيُوتِكُنَّ
“Remain in your homes.”
When you have to leave, try to cover yourself as much as he would permit. Do not put any additional make up or perfume. Do not fight with him or argue over it, but when you do find the ideal moment (from time to time), mention to him how you would love to be exclusively for him, how you do not appreciate strange men looking at you, how the Hijaab serves as a Da’wah, how the Sahabiyaat bore sacrifices for Deen, how so many other females are wearing the Hijaab etc. Start Taleem in the home, and continuously make Dua for him.
As for the remaining queries, there are innumerable new Muslim women who make the adjustment and don the full Hijaab, inspite of the initial difficulty in adapting. We cannot change the laws of Shariah for our personal circumstances. Different people are going through different situations in their lives, and if everyone were to amend the laws of our beautiful religion to suit their challenges, our religion will be totally distorted.
Our life in this world is a test, and every persons test paper is different.
Whilst we understand your difficulty, if you do not wear the Hijaab at present, atleast regard it as your personal weakness. As long as we regard a sin as a sin, there is hope that we will one day repent. We will also try to look for alternatives, or atleast actively try to make gradual changes. However, when we justify our sins or look for loopholes, then the devil will continuously take us deeper and deeper into the sin, and we will never repent.
Make Dua that Allah makes it easy and continuously repent to Allah.